Thursday, September 07, 2006

Darren needs to borrow a gun license

ahem.
Dani likes a boy.
Has since the summertime.
Last week, the conversation at The Lunch Table went like this:

Brian: I don't think anyone likes me.

Dani: What? Of course people like you. EVERYONE likes you. People are constantly passing by saying hi to you.

Brian: No, I mean GIRLS. I don't think any girls like me.

Dani: Uh, I'm sure they do. I know of someone who does.

Brian: WHO?

Dani: Well, she has brown hair.

Brian: THAT narrows it down.

Dani: Seriously. I don't think anyone likes me either.

Brian: YES they do. EVERYONE likes you.

Dani: I mean a boy.

Brian: I know someone who does. He's in the class of 2008. He's tall. He has brown hair.

Dani: THAT narrows it down to about 250 guys.

Brian: I can narrow it down to one.

That night, over a Chipotle steak burrito stuffed with black beans, rice and plenty of avocado, Dani asked me, "What do I say if Brian asks me out?"

Now see, I wasn't caught completely off guard. I saw it coming a mile and a half away. And so I was prepared with an answer for my kid who until that very day thought she'd have to wait 'til she was 15 3/4 before she could go on a date with a boy, 'cause that's how old *I* was when I was allowed my first date. With Jeff, who wore his 80s bangs combed over one eye. My Mom could not STAND Jeff because of those bangs. But oh. Back to Dani...

I answered, "You tell him you'd LOVE to go out with him, but your parents have this lame rule about having to meet him before you're allowed to go out with him."

So that's what she told him. He's coming over for dinner Friday night, this boy named Brian. I sorta already like him, and I've never even laid eyes on him. Darren, however, is having serious reservations. A BOY?

WHO WANTS TO DATE HIS DAUGHTER?

He jokingly said he'll have to buy a shotgun before Friday.

He has 4 weeks to get used to the idea, 'cause Homecoming, the DATE IN QUESTION, is only 24 days away. :)

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

You are an awesome mom!! Dani is lucky to have such a rational mom that she can share everything with. Good luck with the shot gun, um, I mean, Brian.

Anonymous said...

Man time flies! That wouldn't be my brother, Jeff, would it? If it was, your mom had good reason to worry about him in high school....Tara

Anonymous said...

DATIN DANI!
would have never seen it coming... Oh yes i did she is gorgeous i tell you, and her personality like her momma... good luck Darren... there is that song out there that is titled " I loved her first" find and listen to it!
Karen

Nancy D. said...

Heh.

We HAVE me The Boy. He is acceptable.

The back to school dance was last Friday.

We are looking at firearms ourselves...

Stacy said...

LOL, Tara!! No, not your brother Jeff. I was 17 when I started dating him, and YES, he was a bad boy. LOL! The Jeff I'm referring to was a year older than I, and one of my best friends. I had a huge crush on him for a year before he finally asked me out. :)

Dirpus said...

Tell Darren he can borrow my shotgun. It doesn't have a firing pin, so it won't shoot. However, the boy doesn't have to know that. He can just be sitting on the front porch, cleaning it, when the boy comes over.

Anonymous said...

Now I know why you were so eager to let grammy & pappap have the boys tomorrow.

Anonymous said...

Oh, I'll have to chat with Darren. My dad was the KING of running boys off! A few that I can remember... (now, bare in mind that my dad is a 280# biker guy and I'm his only daughter) The first guy came by to "just say HI".. my dad told him I left the country and to not bother coming back. He never did. The second guy (had an enlarged spleen from Mono) so my dad told him "I dust my daughter for fingerprints when she comes home from her dates. If I find yours on her, I'm gonna bust your spleen." And, the last.. "I spent 16 years raising my daughter. If you hurt her in one night, I'll spend the rest of my life hunting you down."
Good luck :) Now, the FUN begins!

amy

Veronica said...

Awwww - that's so sweet! I love the conversation that lead to "the date" ;)

And if Dani thinks he's OK - I am sure that he is. Because Dani is one smart cookie.

Anonymous said...

Ohhhh how exciting!! At least for Dani :o) she's ready to get on that rollercoaster and it's going to be an interesting ride full of ups and downs....but back to the shotgun, Kevin could help Darren out with that one, lol!! He swears he's answering the door with said shotgun in hand when the time arrives....and he has 2 daughters!

Anonymous said...

Well, Stacy, now that we have Erin married off to a suitable young man, we COULD loan you Mike's shooting trophies. Then when your DH is sitting there with his loaner shotgun, (cleaning, oiling, and checking the sights), you could have the trophies up on a shelf behind him.

The jig was up with Zac, as he was just as interested in guns, etc, as the rest of the males in our tribe!

Have fun and enjoy the roller coaster ride. And we are looking forward to seeing the Homecoming Pictures.

agent713 said...

Rodney Atkins has a song on his new CD that is oh so appropriate. Here are the lyrics:

Cleaning This Gun (Come On In Boy)

(MARLA CANNON-GOODMAN/CASEY BEATHARD)

THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENCE
THINK I CAN TELL YOU THAT FIRST SENTENCE
BUT THEN I’M LOST
I CAN’T BEGIN TO COUNT THE THEORIES
I HAD POUNDED IN MY HEAD THAT I FORGOT
I DON’T REMEMBER ALL THAT SPANISH
OR THE GETTYSBURG ADDRESS
BUT THERE IS ONE SPEECH FROM HIGH SCHOOL
I’LL NEVER FORGOT

CHORUS:

COME ON IN BOY, SIT ON DOWN
AND TELL ME ‘BOUT YOURSELF
SO YOU LIKE MY DAUGHTER, DO YOU NOW
YEAH WE THINK SHE’S SOMETHING ELSE
SHE’S HER DADDY’S GIRL AND HER MAMA’S WORLD
SHE DESERVES RESPECT, THAT’S WHAT SHE’LL GET, AIN’T IT SON
NOW Y’ALL RUN ALONG AND HAVE SOME FUN
I’LL SEE YOU WHEN YOU GET BACK
BET I’LL BE UP ALL NIGHT
STILL CLEANING THIS GUN

WELL NOW THAT I’M A FATHER
I’M SCARED TO DEATH ONE DAY MY DAUGHTER’S GONNA FIND
THAT TEENAGE BOY I USED TO BE
WHO SEEMS TO HAVE JUST ONE THING ON HIS MIND
SHE’S GROWING UP SO FAST IT WON’T BE LONG
‘FORE I’LL HAVE TO PUT THE FEAR OF GOD
INTO SOME KID AT THE DOOR

(REPEAT CHORUS)

IT’S ALL FOR SHOW, AIN’T NOBODY GONNA GET HURT
IT’S JUST A DADDY THING, HEY BELIEVE ME MAN, IT WORKS

(REPEAT CHORUS)