Apparently Dani wants another cat. Apparently, Dani wants VERONICA's cat. Veronica asked tonight if it would be okay if she mailed her cat to Dani. Dani and Veronica, please read below:
You may absolutely NOT have another cat. You know how I feel about The Cat we have now. Every day, I threaten to send her back to her mother (whom she now knows as Uncle James) in San Antonio. Why?? Why you ask? Don't play dumb with ME, young lady. Have you SEEN the fur balls lying around everywhere? They roll across the hardwoods like so many tumbleweeds in western New Mexico. Have you HEARD the wretching, spewing, coughing-up-an-alien sound she makes when you "forget" to brush her regularly? Have you STEPPED in barfed-up furball on the stairs in the middle of the night? NO? Hmpf. No. You may not have another cat. Not even Veronica's tabby.
Have you got a few Kangaroos loose in the top paddock?? I'm going to have to pull the pin on this little idea of yours. If you make Dani a prezzy of that cat, I'm going to be cheesed off and send YOU a nice prezzy of AShlie's technicolor yawn. Your postie will be narked! Ashlie already has a bad case of the trots. She leaves little prezzies for me on the bottom step right in front of the dunny door. Stupid Cat. I do not need another one. Abso-bloody-lutely NOT. Don't make me chuck a spaz.
Love you heaps,