"Aidan, keep your HANDS on YOUR side of the car! Ian, keep YOUR FEET on your side of the car. And if you DON'T, my hand is gonna come flyin' to the BACK of the car and wop both of you. DO YOU UNDERSTAND???"
"Well Ian, if you'd stop CLIMBING all over everything like a dadgum MONKEY, then maybe you'd stop falling off the chairs all the time!! Come here. Are you hurt?"
"The next toy I step on on these stairs is gonna get thrown in the TRASH! I don't care if it's your favorite toy!"
"If you boys can't stop squealing, I'm gonna duct tape your mouths. Do you hear me? STOP SQUEALING! STOP! You are not pigs, you are BOYS!"
"Not duck tape. DucT tape. STOP QUACKING!"
"Aidan, stop saying "Holy Banana Peels".
"I don't care who you've heard say 'Holy crap'. You're not allowed to say 'holy anything.' It's not nice."
"Don't stomp off! I'm still talking to you! DANI, GET BACK IN HERE!! Wait. No. JUST GO TO YOUR ROOM!"
"Suck it up, Aidan. Say "MAN, that hurt!" But forevermore, DON't CRY ABOUT IT."
Oh yah. I've got Mother of the Year wrapped up this week.